Under the Moonbeams

I am a creature of the night. No, no. Not in that gothic, spooky way. I have always been a night owl. I thrive when most people are sleeping and no matter how I try to change my sleep pattern, I always come back to the night. I can even stay up all night and all day and then somehow once again I am back on staying up all night. Any job I have had where I have to be up in the morning has either failed or I still come home from work and stay up all night. The night is when my creativity flows, it's when my energy is as its highest, regardless of how many hours of sleep I have had. It's a struggle as an adult to tell my energy that no, it is time to go to bed. We have to do adult things tomorrow! My brain and my heart just laugh at me and keep my awake even longer. I have come to terms with it and I have tried to embrace this fact as much as possible.

This brings me to why I decided to call my blog Under the Moonbeams. I have always been so heavily attracted and influenced by not only the night, but the moon, moon phases, and the stars. I have this attraction to the moon that makes people look at me very funny. I am that person that the first thing they do is look up at the moon and comment on it and secretly in my head I am talking to the moon, saying hi and wondering how its day was while it was not visible to my eye. Over time I began to call the moon "her" and I tell her how beautiful she is and I stare up at her almost as if I am in love.

There is still so much mystery to her and why I love her so much. For 7 years I was married to a man who believed only heavily in science and rationale. He thought my love for the enchanting, the whimsical, and the beautiful was absolutely silly and over time I too thought that it was silly even though I still looked up at the moon and smiled. His views on things slowly began to take over my mind and I began to lose my happiness, the little things that would make me feel like a child, giddy with wonder and curiosity. Now that I am free from that relationship I am slowly beginning to feel those little butterflies in my stomach when I look at the moon, I am falling in love with nature again and it feels amazing.

I am not after followers and don't expect that much of anyone will ever read this outside of a friend and my boyfriend, more so I am excited and inspired to document what is in my heart and watch how I may grown from the scared, hurt girl to someone who believes in the magic of the moon.

Thanks for reading, whoever you may be.

Blessed Be,
Amanda